March 1, 2024   the path

Embracing the dreamworld

I have never only occupied the world that the physical sciences can describe to me. I also occupy a dreamworld that has wild magic as its basis. I am a living bridge between them, as so many others are today on this planet. We each have our own way of translating that magic into something useful to the people living here. And there are thousands of different symbolic systems and ways of making meaning out of the dreamworld. And the question of, “How can they all be true, how can any of them be true?” is irrelevant, because the dreamworld does not operate according to the laws of physics. It has its own logic and its own laws and its own truth. And that truth is often mysterious and paradoxical.

I cannot be nourished by the physical world alone. I deeply need to explore and find meaning in the dreamworld, and translate that meaning into something that is accessible and practical. It’s just part of my nature. Being deeply practical and curious is also part of my nature, so I also love science. They coexist for me, and I understand they don’t coexist for everyone. But I am only here to live my own life, and it’s OK if it doesn’t make sense to everyone.

My survival does not depend on being everyone’s cup of tea. This isn’t the 1500s, and I’m not going to be burned at the stake. It’s safe to be who I am and honor my own truth. And there is no way I can truly be happy and fulfilled in my life if I don’t.

And as I do this work of deep self-acceptance and reclaiming and honoring all the parts of me, I relax. I’m less defensive. I’m less resentful at having to be here on this planet, stuck in this meatsuit. The parts of me that were pushed aside or hidden can finally breathe, and live, and just be who they are. And that feeling of wholeness is worth whatever social consequences may result from just living honestly as myself. I’d rather the discomfort live in the tension of being different than other people sometimes, than for it to live inside me as alienation from myself.

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